


a moment's dilemma

by orphan_account



Category: Newsies - All Media Types
Genre: Boyband AU, F/F, Lots Of Pining In Fact, M/M, Pining, am i apologetic?, can't say i am, david "ive made a complete ass of myself" jacobs?? its likely, jack is very much the leader of the band although its unofficial, katherine is the manager of spot's band that doesn't show up for about 3 years, race has a very obvious crush on spot and he denies it but cant live it down, sarah is their manager, shoutout to quinn for being my ~consultant~, spot is mentioned A Lot though and makes one (1) appearance before everyone else does too
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-03-08
Updated: 2018-04-04
Packaged: 2019-03-28 12:55:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,902
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13904460
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: 1899, put simply, is a boy band who just lost a member due to some... recent disagreements, leaving them with an open spot, and a new band to worry about. Between their new member, David, and their lost member who started a new band just to spite them (or, more accurately, to spite Jack), they aren't quite sure what to be focused on. They thought they had everything figured out."Hi, my name is David, and I'll probably make a fool of myself at this audition."Off to a wonderful start.





	1. prologue

"Hi, my name is David, and I'll probably make a fool of myself at this audition." David winces the moment he finishes his sentence.  _ Off to a wonderful start. You already failed just by saying that. _

  
"Great. Loving the self-confidence," the taller of two blonde guys says.  _ See? _

 

"So, David, how did you hear about this?" the dark haired one asks.

 

"My sister is your manager, actually. I've always been into singing and being onstage and she said you were looking for someone new."

 

"You're Sarah's little brother?!" the taller one asks.

 

David nods. "Yeah, that's her."

 

"She talks about you all the time," the shorter blonde one says sympathetically. "Reasons I'm glad I don't have siblings, number one."

 

David laughs and says, "It can definitely get tiring. Imagine every single one of the teachers you had in high school almost calling you your sibling's name. The amount of times I heard 'S-David' is immeasurable."

 

"Yikes," the dark haired one says. "Bet my little sister has to deal with that now, too."

 

"Good job, Jack," the tall one deadpans.

 

"Hey, watch it, or I'll call your mom," the dark haired one, whose name is apparently Jack, says.

 

"I'm so afraid of my own mother."

 

"Whatever, Race," Jack says.  _ What kind of name…? _ "Anyway, just sing a few bars of something and try to ignore the camera. I hope you're better than the last guy, because if I have to hear that again I might lose it," he jokes.

 

David nods, sings sixteen bars of Waving Through a Window, and ignores the camera the whole time. Jack looks somewhat impressed, and writes a few things down on a sheet of paper that's still almost blank.

 

"Nice, Davey. You were definitely better than the last guy. So, keep an eye on your phone, we'll probably call you back later, okay?" Jack says.

 

David's a little surprised, not even noticing the nickname. He didn't completely bomb the audition! He smiles and says, "Thank you."

 

While he leaves, he hears Race whisper, "He was the best one we've seen, why didn't you just let him in?" and smiles a little wider.

\---

 

Two hours later, he's sitting in his apartment, and he gets a call from an unknown number. Instead of declining the call and blocking the number like usual, he answers.

 

"Hello?"

 

_ "Hey, it's Jack, we talked earlier! So after a lot of deliberation--"  _ There's the sound of a loud slam in the background, and Jack, sounding distant, says,  _ "Shut up, Race, I'm on the phone!" _ Someone, who is presumably Race, yells,  _ "fuck off, tell him the truth!" _ and Jack sighs.  _ "Okay, yeah, it was pretty much guaranteed from the minute we heard you sing, but we've decided that you're one of us now!" _

 

David raises his eyebrows. "...Really?"

 

_ "Heck yeah, dude, you were great!" _

 

"I--thanks, holy shit, um, so you're sure?"

 

_ "Yep! You pretty much won us over immediately, to be honest with you. So, are you in?" _

 

"Um, yeah, totally!"

 

_ "Great! Do you want to meet up tomorrow at Edge Cafe?" _ Race yells  _ "edgy cafe!" _ in the background and David laughs, remembering the location of the little cafe Jack was suggesting.

 

"Sure, sounds good."

 

_ "Okay, cool! We also have a group chat, if you'd like to join it? It's me, Race, Crutchie, and Sarah." _

 

Race, again, in the background, says,  _ "Jack, please don't throw him into that hellhole." _

 

"No, no, it sounds fun!"

 

_ "Nice, I'll add you. Sarah's there too, to try to keep the peace when there never is any. No thanks to Race." _

 

_ "Hey!" _

 

_ "So we'll see you tomorrow, and you can expect a new chat later! Bye!" _

 

"Bye!"

 

Five minutes later, he gets a Discord invitation from the number Jack called him from, and he adds the number to his contacts before clicking the link.

 

\---

 

The next day, David meets Jack and the others at Edge Cafe at 11 in the morning, as planned. He walks in to see Jack very cleary teasing Race about something, and hears just a bit of the conversation while he heads over to their table. "You have a thing for  _ Spot Conlon _ ?!" Jack laughs.

 

Race snatches the phone out of Jack's hand, saying, " _ No _ , no I don't, I do not have a thing for Spot Conlon!"

 

"You totally do!"

 

The other boy, who David has to assume is Crutchie, is laughing at them both.

 

"Stop bullying me!" Race whines, and Jack laughs harder.

 

"This is  _ amazing _ ," Jack says breathlessly. It's at that moment that he notices David walking towards their table. "Hey, Davey's here!" he exclaims.

 

David laughs. " _ Davey _ ? I already have a nickname?"

 

Race sighs and pats his shoulder sympathetically. "They will never call you by your real name ever again. I am so sorry for your loss."

 

Crutchie rolls his eyes. "Oh, come on. It's not that bad,  _ Anthony _ ."

 

Race gives him a disgusted look, saying, "Okay, first of all,  _ ew _ , that felt wrong, never do it again--"

 

Jack wiggles his eyebrows and says, "So only Spot's allowed to call you that, huh?" Race flushes and punches his arm, sinking lower in his chair. David laughs along with Crutchie while Jack rubs his arm where Race punched him and mumbles, "That  _ hurt _ , fucker."

 

"That was the point, you ass. Second of all, it  _ is _ that bad, because now  _ no one _ uses my real name."

 

"That's rough, buddy," Crutchie deadpans. Race laughs and sits up again while Jack turns to David.

 

"How much of that did you hear, earlier?" Jack asks.

 

David shrugs. "I heard that Race has a thing for Spot Conlon." Race almost chokes on his coffee and Crutchie bursts out laughing again and wheezes out something that sounds like "oh my  _ god _ ".

 

Once Race has composed himself again, he says, "I  _ don't _ ," very insistently, and David gives him a look that clearly suggests he doesn't believe a word of it, but doesn't say anything else on the matter. Race groans. "I'm calling Sarah."

 

David just raises his eyebrows. "I'm so afraid of my sister." He realizes that it feels like he's known these people for years even though it's been about five minutes at the most, and he knows little to nothing about them other than their names. He could get used to this.

 

"You should be. She's downright  _ scary _ in rehearsal," Jack says, looking like he's going through some not-so-fond memories. He shakes his head, and adds, "Anyway, we were kind of going to wait until the first rehearsal to tell her you got in, if you didn't tell her already."

 

"I haven't had a chance to call her yet," David says.

 

"Oh, cool, so this works!"

 

"So don't tell her?"

 

"I mean, tell her if you want, it's kind of whatever," Race says before Jack can respond. "Jack's just a dramatic person, that's all."

 

" _ Hey _ !"

 

"Payback!"

 

The two bicker for a while, but it's lighthearted and almost pleasant. Crutchie shares a look with David, a kind of questioning and mischievous look, and David just shrugs in response, not entirely sure what Crutchie's getting at. Crutchie nods and clears his throat. "Race, there's actually something very important we've been meaning to tell you for a while."

 

Race stops mid-sentence to turn to look at him. "What is it?" he asks.

 

Crutchie could have been an actor. He really could have. He looks around like he's making sure no one is listening before leaning across the table, and saying, very quietly, "Spot Conlon."

 

Race jerks back like he was slapped and David absolutely loses his mind laughing. Jack is crying from laughing so hard, tears openly streaming down his face, and Crutchie looks so proud of himself. Race slams his head down on the table and groans, "I want to diiiieeee."

 

Jack wipes his eyes and pats Race's shoulder, saying, "We know. You have a hopeless crush and you crave the sweet embrace of death."

 

Race sits bolt upright and squeaks, "I  _ really don't _ !"

 

"Crave the sweet embrace of death or have a crush on Spot?" Crutchie asks smugly, pulling out his phone.

 

"Both! Neither! I don't know!"

 

Jack, now having calmed down, says, "Okay, okay, we should give Race a break."

 

Race nods. "Yes, yes you do."

 

"He's just a bit confused about his feelings is all!" Jack wheezes, laughing again.

 

" _ Oh god dammit _ ."

 

Crutchie manages to force out, "Okay, done," through his cackling, and Race pales.

 

"...Done with what?"

 

Crutchie laughs harder and Race starts mashing his phone's power button to unlock it, typing in his password at lightning speed and tapping the Twitter icon. He rapidly refreshes Twitter every two seconds until it's been a minute and nothing has shown up.

 

"I have an announcement," Race sighs in relief, "Crutchie has a heart."

 

Crutchie makes an "are you sure?" noise and Race refreshes Twitter one more time in response. He's about to say something along the lines of "cheap tactics don't intimidate me" and then he sees a screenshot posted to Crutchie's account, with him and Spot tagged in the picture. "You didn't."

 

"I did."

 

There is a brief pause in which Race seems to contemplate his existence. "I'm going to terminate my account in life."

 

\---

 

When David gets back to his apartment, he has a slip of paper with an address, date, and time scrawled on it for the first rehearsal.  _ Tomorrow at 9AM, be there or be square _ , it says, in Jack's messy handwriting. David sets his alarm for as late as he possibly can while still having enough time to get ready.

 

He may be a night owl, but he values his sleep endlessly.

 

He takes off his shoes at the door and tosses his keys on the counter before grabbing his laptop on the way to his room. As long as he goes to sleep by eleven, he should have enough time to watch a few episodes of The Great British Baking Show before he goes to bed.

 

\---

 

David wakes up the next morning with his laptop still playing an episode from season 2. His phone is buzzing insistently on his bedside table and he sighs. It's not his alarm; who in their right mind would be calling him at--he checks the clock-- _ Jesus Christ, six in the morning?! _

 

Sarah. Sarah, in her right mind, would be calling him at  _ Jesus Christ, six in the morning _ . Of course she would. Why would David expect anything less of his loving sister?

 

He answers the call. "What do you  _ want _ ."

 

Sarah laughs on the other end.  _ "Just checkin' up on my little brother!" _

 

"At six in the morning?" David sighs.

 

_ "Of course. Who do you take me for?" _

 

It's typical Sarah, really. He shouldn't be surprised. He wants to say something about it, but instead says, "My sister who wouldn't do that to me because we love each other very dearly, maybe?"

 

Sarah mumbles "yikes" under her breath and says,  _ "Oh, sorry, she stepped out a while ago. Something about having to go meet someone named Jesus?" _

 

"You could have just said 'the old Sarah can't come to the phone right now because she's dead' and we could have ended this conversation there."

 

_ "Where's the fun in that? Hey, actually, I have to go soon, so, uh, how'd the audition go?" _

 

_ Time to put those years of theater to use _ , David thinks. "Jeez. Not good. I made a complete fool of myself the minute I walked in, and then my voice cracked half-way through and it was just a bad experience for everyone. I don't think I got in."

 

Sarah sighs.  _ "Sorry to hear that. I really thought you had a chance, y'know? And I guess you did, but there was stuff you couldn't really help." _ He can practically hear Sarah's fond smile through the phone as she says,  _ "But hey, better luck next time, right? I don't know how Jack expects to find someone better than you, but I wish him luck as well." _ David laughs. He really does miss Sarah, and he feels bad for keeping something like this from her, but he'll see her in somewhere around three hours.  _ "Oh yikes, I gotta run, but we'll meet up sometime and catch up, okay? I wanna hear everything." _

 

"Okay. Have a good day!"

 

_ "You too, David. See you soon!" _

 

"Yeah, see you."

 

He hangs up when he hears her end of the line go dead.

 

Now that he's up, he might as well do something.


	2. I

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> David begins to learn the truth about Spot Conlon.

Two and a half hours and about 150 pages in his novel later, David decides it's finally time to get ready to leave for his  _ first rehearsal, oh my god _ . He hasn't felt like this since he was in high school and doing the musical every year. It doesn't help his excitement that this will be the first time he's seen Sarah for what seems like a year, despite only being since her birthday three months ago.

 

This should be interesting.

 

\---

 

He walks into the studio Jack gave him the address to at 8:55, because he's going to make a good first impression, dammit, and everyone is already there and talking. He catches the end of the conversation as he stands at the door for the perfect moment to surprise Sarah.

 

"Well, yeah, it's the new guy's first day," Race says, muffled by the door.

 

"Oh, really? Who is it?" Sarah asks.

 

Jack jumps in, "Ah, no, can't tell you that. We've been sworn to secrecy. Confidentiality agreements and all that. He should be here any minute."

 

David makes eye contact with Crutchie through the small window and receives a nod. He walks in.

 

Sarah turns immediately. "There he is," Jack says, smirking.

 

" _ David _ ?!" She yells, running at him.

 

David laughs as he catches his sister. She's hugging him fiercely and it becomes evident that they've really missed each other in the past few months. Crutchie "aww"s softly and Race mumbles, "I'm gonna cry." A minimum of one phone conversation a month really doesn't compare to this, even though they usually well exceeded that minimum to more like at least one per  _ week _ .

 

"You asshole," Sarah laughs, "You said you bombed the audition. You said--"

 

"I know what I said--"

 

Sarah cuts him off. "You said you made a fool of yourself _. _ "

 

Crutchie snorts. "When he walked in he said 'I'm probably going to make a fool of myself at this audition'."

 

Sarah pulls back and glares at him with no real heat. "You absolute piece of shit."

 

"You love me."

 

" _ Fuck you _ ."

 

"I missed you."

 

"Me too, now let me hug you."

 

"You were  _ just _ \--" David is cut off by Sarah practically squeezing the life out of him and he resigns to his fate, saying, "Or this works too. Okay. Cool."

 

Jack smiles. "Siblings, am I right?"

 

David looks up from the top of Sarah's head and nods. "Siblings," he agrees.

 

Sarah, seemingly realizing something, pulls back and lightly hits David's chest. "You lied to me!"

 

David gives her a confused look. "Did you  _ just _ figure that out, or…?"

 

"You're so mean to me," Sarah laughs.

 

"I hate to break this up, I really do," Crutchie says, "but we have some practicing to get to."

 

"Oh, right!" Sarah exclaims. "Alright guys, first rehearsal without--" She cuts herself off and clears her throat. "First rehearsal without Spot," she continues. (David does  _ not  _ miss the way Race winces.) Sarah smile and adds, "So let's make it a good one, okay?"

 

\---

 

One month later, they're all still getting used to each other, but it's getting easier with every rehearsal. David has all the songs learned by now because he started listening to strictly songs by 1899 to get caught up on lost time. Once, in a weekly livestream, Jack sings about Santa Fe as a joke. Until that  _ one time _ turns into  _ every time _ , and David tells him he should just write a song about Santa Fe.

 

So that's what Jack does.

 

It's a big hit, to no one's surprise. David has been kicking himself for it ever since he heard the first few notes of it.

 

It isn't just Jack who's worked on a new song. Race and Crutchie have both started working on individual projects David never gets to hear anything about. All Race will say about his song is that New York is in the title, and Crutchie won't even give a hint about his. They've talked about their songs to each other, but they're both sworn to secrecy.

 

As for David, he's also started to work on a song. The only things he has figured out are the title and first verse of what he hopes will be four, but it's coming along nicely. Rehearsals have been reduced to everyone working on their own individual projects or, in Jack's case, helping Sarah with her "manager stuff".

 

One time, one very cursed time, Jack catches a glimpse of whatever Race has been writing, and the first thing he says is, "Why did you write it so high?!"

 

"Fight me, Jack," Race deadpans, scribbling more words onto the page in his notebook that is currently littered with phrases and ideas, "Denny's. Three in the morning. Back parking lot."

 

"No one else can sing that high!" Jack complains.

 

"Then I'll write in more harmonies. Kindly fuck right off." (What Race actually does, to appease Jack or get him to stop nagging him about it, is rewrite the melody but "much more chill".) 

 

\---

 

After a few successful concerts and Race and Crutchie's songs being released, everyone's waiting to hear what David's been working on for the past two and a half months.

 

It happens as an accident. They're halfway through a concert, and David had given the music to Sarah so she could look it over and make sure everything was in order before passing it out at the next rehearsal. The type of behavior David exhibits is allowed but not encouraged when he asks, "How would you guys feel about sight-reading something?"

 

Jack gasps. "If this is your new song--"

 

David nods and says, "It is."

 

"Heck yeah, let's go!"

 

So David asks Sarah, bless her soul for putting up with them, to pass out the music then and there. She does, because she's a saint and they don't deserve her (and she tells them as much). They end up sight-reading Seize the Day a cappella, with no context or background knowledge and no precedent to follow, but it ends up going great. (There are minor mess-ups, such as, "Neighbor to--oh, that was so off--Father to son / One for all and all for one," and, "Send-- _ raise _ up the torch and light the way.")

 

After the concert, when David finally turns his phone back on, he has so many mentions on Twitter that his phone malfunctions and shuts itself back down. He calls it a win. It was about time he let someone hear the song, so why not a huge room full of thousands of people?

 

\---

  
  


It isn't too much longer before David finally learns about the importance of Spot Conlon. He just would've guessed that it would be Race telling the story, not Crutchie.

 

"Spot's the reason we needed you," Crutchie explains one day after the others have left and they stayed behind to work out some more harmonies. "He was with us. At one time, obviously, not now." Crutchie laughs bitterly and takes a deep breath. "He got in a fight with Jack. Something messy. Something that was big enough to make him leave." He sighs. "I can't give you the details. All I can say is that it was bad, and no one told Race until the official announcement went out. Spot still likes music, and he really loved being onstage, so when he left, he made his own band."

 

There's just one thing David doesn't understand. "But why? If he was happy with you guys, why would he leave?"

 

Crutchie just sighs. "It doesn't matter. Even if it did, I shouldn't tell you. Jack wouldn't be happy with me," he jokes. "I can say that things weren't good for a long while before everything blew up. It was only a matter of time, you know? It was better for them to get it out while it was just between the two of them instead of dragging us into it." He pauses. "Well, instead of dragging  _ me _ into it."

 

Crutchie doesn't say anything else about it for the rest of the night. Instead of feeling fulfilled because he  _ finally knows the story _ , David feels empty without the details.

 

At least, not until he meets Spot Conlon himself. 

 

\---

 

Spot is everything David did not expect him to be. He's heard many things about Spot; he has three tattoos (false); he's tall and scary ( _ extremely _ false); he still holds a grudge against the members of 1899 ( _ also _ extremely false); he'll probably hate David (surprisingly false, actually); he's secretly really nice (okay, that one's true).

 

When David meets Spot before rehearsal one day, when no one else is there yet, he's  _ nice _ . Really nice. He was told Spot would be exceedingly rude and cold the first time they met, and he's greeted with the exact opposite. There's a shocking lack of bad blood about David "stealing his place" or "replacing him" or something equally as ridiculous. In fact, one of the first things Spot does is ask how his former bandmates are doing.

 

They talk for awhile, and it's far less awkward than everyone led him to believe. David dimly realizes he doesn't even know why Spot's there in the first place. When he asks, Spot says, "I have to talk to someone about something.

 

Before David can stop himself, he says, "You have to talk to  _ Race _ about something." He immediately apologizes, but Spot laughs.

 

"I can't even fault you for this. When you're right, you're right."

 

When Jack shows up, things seem completely chill between the two of them, and David is  _ extremely confused _ because weren't they the ones who had issues with each other?

 

Well, yes, yes they were. As David would later find out from Jack himself, it turns out that the two of them, both having large personalities, were always sort of destined to fail if they were put together. (David has to assume, at that point, that the fallout was something of a power struggle, and then he remembers what Crutchie said about getting dragged into the issue and he immediately shuts the idea down.)

 

Race shows up a few minutes later, which distracts David from his worrying, and Jack takes David into the studio to leave them alone.

 

When they reach the inside of their part of the studio, Jack turns to David. "Do you have any idea what went down with Spot?"

 

David sighs. "I don't have any details. I've heard bits from Crutchie and pieced together some other stuff, so I have a general idea, but nothing concrete. Why?"

 

Jack rubs between his eyes and groans, muttering, "Crutchie, why," under his breath before saying, "I'll explain everything after rehearsal. If you want me to, that is."

 

David is  _ stunned _ . He didn't think it would be this easy. He agrees.

 

They can't talk about anything further, but Jack promises they'll go to Edge Cafe after rehearsal as Crutchie comes in. It's not something they all talk about together. It's best to leave it there and revisit it later.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im barely sorry, quinn :)


	3. II

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jack explains everything, and also tells a story of when he drank paint water.

At this point in their career together, rehearsals are running smoothly, and everything goes off without a hitch. Crutchie presents his new song, an upbeat tune that David thinks sounds like a big opening number to a musical, and the only thing different about this particular rehearsal, other than the addition of the new song, is that there's a certain nervous energy that's never been there before. No one else comments on it, so David writes it off as nothing.

 

Because of how well rehearsal goes, it's not long before it's over and it's just Jack and David again. David hates to admit how excited he is, but he's gone months hearing vague whispers of Spot, only met him once, and got an even vaguer explanation of everything that happened. He's glad Jack offered to take care of everything and put his imagination to rest.

 

Sue him, he worked on the newspaper in high school. He still has reporter blood running through his veins, having just graduated a little over half a year ago. He misses the feeling of chasing a story, and this is the most fun he's had investigating something since there was that chemistry sabotage in sophomore year.

 

Jack takes him to Edge Cafe, and it wouldn't have taken a genius to guess that this would happen here. When they're finally sitting down with their drinks, Jack smiles at him. "So, what do you know so far?"

 

David takes a moment to choose his words carefully. "I know there was a fight," he says, "And I know Spot left and that's why I'm here. I know that Race has some bigger role in everything than anyone is letting on. That's it."

 

Jack nods. "Crutchie did a real good job of explaining enough to leave you curious, didn't he?"

 

"Yes, he did," David laughs.

 

"Was there anything you were able to figure out?" Jack asks. David stares at him blankly for a second before realizing what he means.

 

"I was able to figure out that it was something to do with who holds leadership. Is that why you don't have an official leader anymore?"

 

"Damn, you're smarter than I thought," Jack jokes despite the tension in the room, and David fixes him with a flat look. "Okay, okay, sorry. You just got it right immediately. God, how do you _do_ that?"

  
"Do what, be right all the time?" David deadpans. Jack laughs.

 

"Is it a talent, is it taught, or did you inherit it from your great uncle, the Tibetan monk?"

 

"Oh, definitely inherited."

 

Jack nods sagely. "Yes. Of course. How could I be so blind?" His composure cracks and soon they're both laughing. The tension that was there is suddenly gone, and David can't help but allow a grin once they've calmed down again.

 

"So, how do you wanna do this? Do you wanna just… go?" David asks.

 

"I mean, I could just info-dump on you right now." Jack shrugs. "It's whatever. I'm not upset about it anymore."

 

David is a bit shocked that Jack was ever upset in the first place, because he seems so indifferent about it now, but even the most stable people can just be a calm exterior, so he throws away that notion almost immediately. "Just info-dump. I'm ready to get to the bottom of this."

 

Jack nods. "I would too if something was getting hinted at and dangled just out of reach for… three months now? Four?"

 

"Four," David confirms.

 

"Yeah. Four months," Jack says. Realization crosses his face. "Four months! Davey, we've been doing this for four months!"

 

David laughs somewhat giddily. "We have, oh my god!"

 

"Right, yeah, but," Jack begins, "We gotta get back to this before you explode."

 

" _Please_."

 

"Okay, so, you were definitely right about the power issue thing, because we were both kind of equally supported? No one could ever come to a decision because it was just split down the middle and we never actually came to a decision until Spot left and I was the only option. That wasn't even the real problem, though, which I'm sure you've guessed." David nods, and Jack continues. "We were always bickering. It never stopped. I think everything we said to each other when we weren't onstage was another jab or an insult. I can't remember a single peaceful interaction between us for the last two months of him being one of us."

 

"Yikes," David mumbles.

 

"Right? So this one time, we're getting really personal, I don't remember why. Eventually everything was, like, cutting straight to the bone. So I said, 'Where do your loyalties really lie anymore? With us, or with Race?' because _obviously_ I had to hit him where it would hurt." Jack seems to be cursing himself, and David isn't sure what to do to help. If he even _can_ . He chooses to let Jack talk, because he probably hasn't ever said this to anyone else. _This was what Crutchie meant about getting dragged into it_ , David realizes. He doesn't comment, and Jack sighs. "I don't know if he was trying to piss me off or if he was being serious, because I'm pretty sure they're equal possibilities, but he said he was more loyal to Race. Which I guess makes sense because I hit him hard and he had to hit me back. I think he was just trying to push my buttons because he didn't actually say anything about leaving until a week later. Must've realized it was true or something. So we discussed everything in private and we didn't tell anyone other than Sarah until after the official announcement went up."

 

Raising his eyebrows, David sips his coffee, which is now cool enough that he won't burn himself. "This sounds like a soap opera," he comments. Jack smiles.

 

"It does, doesn't it?" He shakes his head. "But that's not even the worst part. I think the worst part is that I can't even tell Race the real reason why. It would crush him, and then I'd be a dead man." When David looks at him quizzically, he adds, "Spot would murder me."

 

David considers this carefully for a second. "Maybe it'll just hurt worse if you don't tell him."

 

Jack looks at him incredulously. "And risk losing another valuable member? Thanks, but I'll pass."

 

"What if he finds out by himself and then he thinks you don't trust him? Then he might leave anyway," David reasons.

 

"While you may be right," Jack counters, "Not only is it a risk I have to take, it's also something I can generally count on. High-stakes information like this being held between the two of them will never see the light of day if it's Spot who has a secret. He's afraid of hurting Race. Been walking on eggshells for about five years, at least."

 

David nearly spits out his coffee. "Are you telling me," he coughs, "That they _both_ are into each other and they won't even admit it?"

 

Jack bursts out laughing and says, "I think that's what's happening, yeah!" Once they've calmed down again, Jack sighs. "Well, I know you're a trustworthy dude, but you gotta swear to secrecy. Delta Nu sister swear or whatever."

 

David snorts. "Okay, Elle."

 

Jack's eyes widen a bit. "I'm so glad you got the reference!" he gushes. "But, uh, yeah. You can't let anyone else know about this. _Especially_ Race."

 

"Of course," David says, "My lips are sealed."

 

"Good." Jack nods approvingly. "So, I had this idea for a new song."

 

\---

 

Nearly an hour later, David bids Jack goodbye and heads back to his apartment. He hasn't made it through two pages of his novel when Sarah calls.

 

_"So, you and Jack, huh?"_ is the first thing she says to him.

 

"Not even a 'hello'?" David deadpans.

 

_"Answer the question. I gotta know."_

 

"There's nothing with me and Jack. He was explaining the Spot situation."

 

_"Are you sure that's all? Just explaining the Spot situation wouldn't take an hour."_

 

David sighs. "Yes, Sarah, I was there. He was brainstorming ideas for a new song and he wanted my opinion."

 

_"...Mhmm. I swear, if you become a mutual pining situation like Spot and Race I might lose my--"_

 

"Wait, what?! I was right?"

 

He can practically _hear_ Sarah rolling her eyes through the phone. _"Yes, David, we all knew. They weren't exactly subtle."_

 

"I mean, there's all the jokes about Race having something for Spot but I thought it was just easy to make fun of or something!"

 

_"Every joke has a little bit of truth,"_ Sarah sighs, _"You should know that better than anyone, with your failed comedy career back in the sixth grade--"_

 

"Please stop, Jesus Christ. I thought we agreed to never speak of that again!"

 

_"You said 'Sarah, please never talk about this again,' and I said 'whatever, loser' and that was that. I didn't agree to shit."_

 

David winces at the memory. "...You were mean in middle school."

 

_"I still think you're a loser, but you're my favorite loser, so it is what it is."_

 

David realizes, at this moment, that he never said anything to Sarah about he and Jack's conversation. "Wait. How did you know about me and Jack?"

 

_"Nothing gets past me,"_ Sarah says cryptically.

 

"Nope, you're not getting away with that bullshit today. Explain."

 

_"Jack told me. He just said you two were talking, and you know where my mind went with that."_

 

David flushes. " _Sarah_!"

 

_"Hey, don't blame me! Jack's hot, you're gay, I mean--"_

 

"I am not that kind of person! You know this!"

 

_"People change! How was I supposed to know you're still an innocent little baby?!"_

 

"I am _not_ an innocent baby!"

 

_"Right. And my name is Katherine--"_ Sarah cuts herself off and clears her throat. _"Well, anyway, last time I checked you were still blushing every time a cute boy looked at you!"_

 

"That never happened," David lies, choosing to ignore the first part of her statement.

 

_"David, sweetie, we were in the same high school for three years. I think I would have remembered something like that."_

 

"It didn't!"

 

_"...Do you need a list?"_

 

"Stop talking about my love life," David groans.

 

_"Or lack of one."_

 

"Sarah Anne Jacobs, I _swear_."

 

_"What'll you do? You have no dirt on me."_

 

David briefly contemplates moving this conversation to voice chat on Discord so he can have Race's support of having an older sister as well. This is hell, and he has no idea how he ever survived living under the same roof as Sarah. He decides against it, and instead counters with, "I'll call mom and ask for baby pictures. I'll show the whole band."

 

Sarah gasps. _"How dare you? I have no clapback for that!"_

 

"Suddenly, I'm glad mom lost my baby pictures," David says breezily.

 

_"Fuck right off!"_ Sarah says.

 

"Oh, would you look at the time! I gotta go, I have places to be! Goodbye Sarah, I'll talk to you tomorrow!"

 

As David pulls the phone away to hang up, he hears the words, _"later, asshole,"_ and he knows he's done something right.

 

\---

 

Sure enough, during their monthly livestream the next day, Sarah says, "David was being a fake hoe yesterday. He said he had _places to be_. Excuse me, but we all know you lack a social life, and thus don't have anywhere to be except at home, probably reading. Don't even talk to me right now."

 

David gasps in mock offense as Race almost falls off the couch from laughing too hard and Jack chokes on his water. Crutchie has been documenting the whole thing on Snapchat, and he's quietly laughing behind his phone to get "prime audio quality".

 

Ten minutes and three stories about siblings later, Jack says, "Oh, here's a funny story. Not sibling related, though."

 

"Oh dear god," David says, "Is there any illegal activity involved?"

 

Jack gasps. "Me? _Illegal activity_?"

 

"It's likely," Race deadpans, and Jack hits the back of his head. " _Ow, what the fu_ \--"

 

" _Language_ ," Crutchie stresses.

 

Race just rolls his eyes, and Jack continues, "Let me preface this by saying that paint water sometimes looks like Gatorade and I am not always the brightest individual."

 

"Please don't tell me this is going where I think it's going," Sarah says. Jack doesn't respond.

 

"Wait, are you serious?" Race asks, and Jack nods.

 

"Yes. So anyway, I was designing an album cover one time, and everything was normal. I was sleep deprived as usual and the water I was cleaning my brushes in was in a clear bottle," Jack explains, and adds, "Never a good idea."

 

David sighs. "Please stop."

 

"No, seriously! At this particular point in time, I had Gatorade in the fridge for some reason, right?"

 

"Sure, Jack," Crutchie agrees.

 

Jack nods. "Yeah! Thanks for your support, Crutchie. Well, as I said, I am not the brightest individual. My dumb ass didn't realize paint water was paint water, and I dumped out the Gatorade I had been drinking and put the paint water in the fridge. I took a shower, and then I went to get a drink."

 

Sarah laughs, and Race says, " _Oh my god_."

 

David just groans, "Why? Why are you like this?"

 

"I picked up the bottle and unscrewed the lid," Jack begins, "I was like, 'Huh, this smells funny. Maybe it's expired. Well, what's the worst that could happen?' And I decided to drink some anyway."

 

"Dear lord!" Crutchie exclaims, staring at Jack in horror.

 

"Yep. So I took a sip."

 

Jack doesn't add anything on, so Sarah prompts him with, "...and?"

 

"And then another."

  
" _No_ ," Race laughs.

 

"And one more for good measure."

 

Crutchie yells, "You _absolute_ \--"

 

Jack holds up a hand to cut him off and Crutchie stops. "And I was like, 'Hm. This tastes off. That's strange.' So I chugged some."

 

Race bursts out laughing while Crutchie imagines what paint water tastes like, gagging, and David facepalms. Sarah has been cackling on the floor for a while now and it doesn't look like she'll be getting up any time soon.

 

When the room is relatively quiet again, Jack says, "I said to myself, 'That's so weird. This tastes like paint.'"

 

"Do you just know what paint tastes like?!" David cries, and Jack nods, cringing.

 

"I was a dumb kid."

 

"And an even dumber adult, apparently," Crutchie sighs.

 

"Shh, I'm not even done yet," Jack says.

 

"How could this get any _worse_?" Race asks, and Jack gives him a look.

 

"It's me we're talking about. Things can _always_ get worse." Race nods, and Jack continues the story. "After I chugged like half the bottle, I was like, 'I… do not feel great. Maybe I'm sick.' Because I didn't put the pieces together."

 

Race gasps. "Wait, I think I remember this!"

 

Jack just holds up a hand again. "So I went to bed, like, 'I'll probably sleep it off and I'll be fine.' Wrong. Two hours later, I woke up and called Race to take me to the emergency room."

 

It's not just Sarah who is cackling on the floor now. Race has joined her, and David is almost there as well. Crutchie just sighs in disappointment and says, "This is why you can't have nice things."

 

Race manages to say, "Yes, I remember!" before going back to laughing with tears streaming down his cheeks.

 

Jack nods. "And that's the story of how Race took me to the emergency room at almost four in the morning to get my stomach pumped."

 

"Jesus _Christ_ ," David wheezes.

 

Sarah pounds the floor a couple of times and tries to catch her breath. "I am in _physical pain_ ," Race says breathlessly.

 

Crutchie just gives Jack a shaming look.

 

Jack has a feeling this is going to be a very long livestream.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wHEW im so emotionally attached to this story now, can yall believe it??


	4. III

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We know all about Race's big gay problem, but what about Albert's? Well, Spot has a plan to fix it. Er, well, not really, but if there's one thing Spot Conlon knows, it's that he's done with Albert's pining bullshit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i had a busy past couple of weeks but im back at it!!

Jack was, surprisingly, correct in his assumption. Almost half an hour after he tells the paint water story, the door opens and Spot walks in with a girl David doesn't recognize. Sarah brightens at the sight of her, though, so he has to assume she is somewhat normal, or at least passable. "What's good, Annie," Spot deadpans.

 

Sarah glares at him. "How many times have I told you not to call me that?"

 

Spot shrugs and says, "About as many times as I've called you that because I'm a stubborn motherfu--"

 

Crutchie shushes him loudly. "We are in the middle of a  _ family friendly _ livestream! Watch your mouth, thanks!"

 

Spot holds up his hands in mock surrender and three more people David has never seen before walk in.

 

"The three musketeers are here, too," the girl says, a hint of sarcasm present in her tone. David raises his eyebrows. He approves of at least two of the five new additions to the stream. Sarah snorts and the three who just walked in just shrug.

 

"Guess that's kinda true, since Spot's off with Race all the time," the shortest one with dark hair snarks.

 

Spot turns to him with a glare. "Hey, how about you shut up,  _ Elmie _ ?"

 

Race laughs for a second before clapping a hand over his mouth at the look Elmie gives him and saying, "Sorry, sorry. Not funny. Got it."

 

Elmie-- _ what kind of name is that _ \--just nods approvingly and turns back to Spot. "So, Spotty," he begins. Spot makes an indignant sound and Elmie shrugs. " _ So _ ," he repeats, "why exactly did you and Katherine drag us all here?"

 

Spot looks into the camera like he's on The Office. "To crash their party," he monotones.

 

"Of course," Jack says. "Why else would the great Spot Conlon grace us with his presence?"

 

"Hush your heck, Kelly, I'll expose you," Spot threatens, plopping down next to Race on the couch.

 

"H--" Jack takes a deep breath. "Hush my  _ what _ now?"

 

"Hush your heck," Spot repeats. "You heard me."

 

Crutchie looks to the door where the "three musketeers" are still standing and says, "You guys do know you can come sit down, right?"

 

"Oh. Duh," the redheaded one laughs. He chooses to sit in front of Jack's legs and looks up at him. "Hiya, Cowboy."

 

Jack groans. "Please don't."

 

"What's wrong, Cowboy?" Spot asks. "Don't like the nickname?"

 

"Hate it, in fact," Jack says lightly.

 

"Jeez, sorry, Cowboy." Elmie settles in on the other side of the redhead and the one with glasses takes a seat next to David, who is "hopefully the sane one".

 

"I am," David says when he's informed of this. "If it weren't for me, Jack would have burned down his apartment. In fact, he'd probably have burned this place down, too. There isn't anything that can make fire in this room but I'm sure he'd find a way."

 

"Hey, that's mean," Jack whines. Race shoots him a look, but before he can say anything, the redhead's phone rings.

 

Spot raises his eyebrows and asks, with a suggestive lilt to his voice, "Is it Finch?"

 

"Wink wink, Al, get some. You should put it on speaker," Elmie says.

 

Al just rolls his eyes and answers the phone, following Elmie's request. The voice on the other end deadpans,  _ "Of course my name on your phone is the absolute most problematic thing you could think of. Why do I even try?" _

 

"You love me." Elmie snorts and Al glares at him. Elmie raises his hands in mock surrender.

 

_ "Sure, and my name is Romeo. Speaking of Romeo, he wanted me to make sure Specs isn't dead. He's alive, right?" _

 

Al looks up at Specs--because that's his name, apparently--and says, "Yup. Still using big, smarty-pants words like 'perfunctory' and everything."

 

_"Nice,"_ Finch says, as Specs shoots back, "You're just mad because you don't know what it means."

 

Al nods. "I sure don't!"

 

_ "I'm pretty sure I used it in a paper once? I… may not have used it correctly, but I used it!" _

 

"Finch gets points for effort," Specs says.

 

_ "Thanks," _ Finch laughs. Another voice yells something in the background and he replies fondly with,  _ "Yes, Romeo, your boyfriend is upright and breathing. Please calm down." _

 

Al snorts and says, "Drama queen."

 

Finch gasps.  _ "No, don't say that, you'll encourage him." _ He sighs when Romeo, presumably, yells something else, and says,  _ "I should go before he breaks something. Or burns something. Or hurts himself. Or--" _

 

"Oh my God," Specs says, "I can't even be mad at you because that's what would happen if he was left unsupervised for too long."

 

_ "I've been gone for like two minutes. I have no right to be this concerned. Anyway, I've gotta go make sure Romeo hasn't passed out yet, but go off, I guess. Bye, idiot." _

 

"Later, loser," Al says. Elmie raises his eyebrows and Al, in return, raises his middle finger in Elmie's general direction.

 

When the line goes dead, Katherine laughs and Crutchie says, "You're not doing a very good job of hiding your big gay problem, Al."

 

"I know," Al groans.

 

"Tragic," Race deadpans, and Jack gives him a look.

 

"You  _ really _ wanna talk about hiding big gay problems, Race?" Jack asks, and David snorts. Race flushes and attempts to stutter out a reply for a few seconds before giving up and sinking further into the couch.

 

"I think you've gone through the five stages of grief over this since I first met you," David comments.

 

"Oh my God, he  _ has _ ," Crutchie agrees. "Let's see. Denial… 'I do not have a thing for S--'"

 

" _ Don't finish that sentence unless you're ready to go six feet under _ ," Race hisses. Crutchie raises his hands in mock surrender, and continues regardless.

 

"Anger. That one interview. Do you remember, Jack?" Crutchie asks.

 

Jack snorts. "Dear lord. We all remember that."

 

Race seems to sink further into the couch, somehow, and Crutchie adds, "Bargaining. 'Well, if I have a thing for this person, you have a thing for this other person.'"

 

Jack nods, piling on the dragging with, "Depression. 'I'm so fucking done with this bullshit, Jack, just let me perish. He's too pretty and nice and--'"

 

"Language," Crutchie reminds, "But yeah, that's pretty accurate."

 

" _ Oh my God _ ," Elmie laughs.

 

"Acceptance. 'Okay fine maybe I'm a  _ little _ gay for this person.'"

 

"Don't even talk to me," Race groans.

 

"I can't tell if I want to laugh at you or defend what little honor you have left," Spot says.

 

"I want to argue with this but I  _ can't _ ," Race mumbles.

 

"I know I should apologize on behalf of David, because he won't do it, but honestly? I can't even bring myself to," Sarah comments.

 

"Gee, thanks."

 

"Suffer," David chirps. Al giggles and David tacks on, "You're in the same boat, why are you laughing?"

 

Al just stares at him. "I... Wow. Where'd you manage to find this one, Jack?"

 

"Sarah's brother," Jack answers.

 

"Makes sense." Al nods. "I don't know why I expected anything less with sass like that."

 

Sarah gasps. "I'm pretty sure that was supposed to be an insult but I'm so proud!"

 

Katherine laughs, one of the only contributions she's made to the conversation, and says, "I would be too."

 

"I know," Elmie, Specs, Spot and Al chorus.

 

"Oh my God," Spot continues, "you  _ spoke _ . Without dragging us!"

 

Katherine rolls her eyes. "Believe me, my internal monologue is very colorful. Mostly just you and Al, because Specs and Elmer are angels."

 

Spot gasps in mock offense and  _ Elmer _ \-- _ that's _ his name--smiles. "That's it," Spot says, "we're leaving. C'mon Al, we don't need to take this."

 

"I'm good," Al says, "but go off, I guess."

 

"You're even  _ quoting his memes _ now," Elmer points out. "You're so gone it's not even funny anymore. Just  _ sad _ ."

 

Crutchie makes a noise and says, "Depends on who you ask. To most, this is super depressing, but it's actually kinda cute."

 

Al whips around. "I am  _ not cute _ , I am  _ ruggedly handsome _ !" he yells.

 

"Right," Jack says. "Totally not cute. I'm sure Finch would agree."

 

Albie stutters and Race gasps. "Albie, we can make a support group for troubled gays!"

 

_ These names just keep getting weirder _ , David thinks, as Albie says, "We could, but we really shouldn't."

 

"It's true, but he shouldn't say it," Katherine deadpans.

 

Somehow, they manage to get back on track with answering questions from fans, and two hours later, the livestream ends. David learns that Albie's name is actually  _ Albert _ , which is good, because he  _ really _ didn't want to go his whole life thinking of him with the wrong name. When he gets home, he realizes for the first time all night just how exhausted he is, and barely has the mental presence to change into pajamas before collapsing in bed.

 

\---

 

Spot wakes up the next morning with nearly twenty texts from Albert. His first thought is  _ what the fuck _ and his second, closely following the previous, is  _ I bet this is about his big gay problem _ .

 

He begrudgingly opens his chat with Albert and winces at the amount of caps-lock he's immediately bombarded with.

 

**7:32 AM**

 

**albitch:** SPOT

 

**albitch:** SPOT IM SO FUCKIGN LKVNLDAFKB

 

**albitch:** _ FINCH JUST POSTED ANOTHER COVER AND I CANT FU N C TI ON _

 

**albitch:** I??? AM A GAY BITCH???????????? H H H H H H

 

**albitch:** LIKE IM ['ok' hand emoji] THIS CLOSE TO CRYING

 

**albitch:** I LOVE HIM S O M UC H

 

**albitch:** BUT IF YOU THINK IM GOING TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT YOURE DEAD WRONG HOE ITS NEVER GONNA HAPPEN

 

**albitch:** IS THIS HOW YOU FEEL ABT RACE BECAUSE MAYBE IT'S ME AND YOU WHO NEED THE TROUBLED GAYS SUPPORT GROUP

 

**albitch:** like ok

 

**albitch:** so

 

**albitch:** i just.

 

**albitch:** hes so pretty who gave him the fucking  _ right _

 

**albitch:** ok god gave him the right but--

 

**albitch:** h ow ?

 

**albitch:** he doesnt even KNOW he's pretty im so pissed

 

**albitch:** and????? his voice????????? noah fence but fuCK ME UP

 

**albitch:** its a goddamn shame you were the founder of this band bc i wouldve killed to start a band with him in it hes so GOOD i just UGH

 

**albitch:** im SO FUCKING GAY spot you have NO IDEA i mean. GOD.

 

Spot rubs his eyes and thinks,  _ The best part of waking up is Albert fucking screaming at you, I guess. _

 

**11:28 AM**

 

**spotty:** i have a pretty good idea bc you forced me to read all that with my own two goddamn eyes

 

**spotty:** why couldnt you text race with this bullshit ffs

 

**spotty:** he would probably pile on the suffering with whoever his BGP is tbh

 

When Albert doesn't respond, Spot decides it's as good a time as any to get out of bed. The sun is entirely too bright for the morning after a late night--rather,  _ early morning _ livestream with Jack, of all people, who survives on late nights, coffee, and pure spite against God. Elmer was practically sleepwalking when they finally left at nearly five in the morning. It's a wonder Albert was awake enough at seven thirty to type coherently, big gay problem or not.

 

Spot sits up and jumps when his phone rings.

 

**_albitch_ ** _ is calling. _

 

"Oh for fuck's sake," he mumbles, answering the call.

 

_ "Spot. Spot, oh my fucking--" _

 

"I do not give a single, solitary,  _ flying _ fuck about your big gay problem, Al." He sighs. "With that said, what did he do now?"

 

_ "He's just--" _ Albert groans.  _ "I don't know, he's just so goddamn perfect, I can't find anything wrong with him." _

 

"Everyone has flaws," Spot deadpans, and Albert  _ laughs at him _ . "Hey," he warns.

 

_ "Sorry, sorry." _

 

"You're not, but okay."

 

_ "I have been suffering alone for four hours and you expect me to be sorry? No, bitch, suffer with me." _

 

"Just ask him out already so I don't have to deal with your bullshit anymore."

 

_ "Wha--I can't--no? That is not how this works, Spot!" _

 

Spot rolls his eyes and gets out of bed with as much enthusiasm as an exhausted sloth. "Then tell me how it works. Enlighten me."

 

_ "Fuckin'... If I wanted to be obliterated I would have called Kath, first of all." _

 

Spot hums, begins walking to the kitchen, and says, "Sounds like more of a  _ you _ problem."

 

_ "Second of all," _ Albert continues, choosing to ignore him,  _ "I'm like, 90% sure he's into Elmer. Do you see my problem?" _

 

"I've been seeing your problem for months now, and you still haven't tried to  _ fix it _ no matter how much advice I give you. Someone's afraid of rejection."

 

_ "Pfft, no. I'm just content with how things are right now." _

 

"If you give me that 'I don't want to ruin our friendship' bullshit I will drive over to your apartment right now just so I can slap you."

 

_ "...well, that was the plan, but, uh, plans can change." _

 

"Good." Spot sets to making coffee while he allows Albert to go back to whatever he was going to say.

 

_ "I mean, like, there's nothing stopping me. I could ask him out. Things would be fine. Like, he'll probably say no, and that's fine because I've ran that scenario through my head enough times that I have a plan. And like, that's great. But at the same time, I am perfectly happy with how my life is going right now. There's just that one tiny thing called the lack of a boyfriend that is currently bothering me." _

 

Spot sighs. "So fix the fucking problem, Al, and call me back when you have results. I expect a call by six tonight, good luck!"

 

_ "WHAT--" _

 

"Goodbye!" Spot chirps, hanging up.  _ This should be interesting. _

 

\---

 

Albert sighs.  _ Jesus Christ. I've just put a deadline on myself. Great. _ Really, he should have expected this. He went to  _ Spot _ , of all people, of  _ course _ he'd just be told to get his shit together and go for it. Nervously, he exits out of his messages with Spot, and switches to his messages with Finch.

 

**11:34 AM**

 

**albitch:** we need to talk

 

**finchie:** oh

 

**finchie:** that does not sound good

 

**finchie:** just give me a time and place

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SCREAM AT ME ABT FINCHAL BC THEY DESERVE THE WORLD
> 
> ON TUNGLE.HELL: CASS-LOVES-NEWSIES/CASS-WRITES-THINGS
> 
> ON TWOTTER: ICONIQUE_BINCH

**Author's Note:**

> ya bitch is procrastinating dgcg on the lowkey to write this but tbh i fully blame the discord
> 
> yall shouldnt have let me scream @ you about a boyband au because h e r e i t i s


End file.
